Some nights I just want to tell all of my responsibilities to go eff themselves. Some nights I just want to get into my car and drive. Just get on the interstate, no destination in mind, with my dorm and little college town in my rear view mirror.
I'd turn up my faithful Subaru's stereo and drown out the world with the sound of Mumford & Sons. A tear or two might make their way down my face, their origin or reason unknown. Alone in my car, free to be the realest version of me, reasons aren't required.
I might end up going North. Stopping in the city so familiar to me for a late night cup of coffee. Or maybe I'd take the exit towards the place that I recognize as home and spend the night in a peaceful sleep, curled up in my childhood bed.
I might end up passing the exit sign for home and travel another hour towards the school my best friend from high school attends and holds so dear. I'd stop in front of her dorm and she'd claim her rightful spot in the passenger seat. We'd just drive to pass the time as we talked about it all. How life isn't treating us particularly poorly or well, but how something about right now just doesn't fit right into the hollow space in our chests.
Or I might go South, or East, or West. It'd be just me and the steering wheel against the world. The life that's breaking me for no particular reason, a distant memory.
But I've got people I love here. People who need me just as much as I need them. So, at least for tonight, I'll stay, and if you'd just be so kind as to hold my hand, we could face the world together.
Always,
(or at least for now)
L.A.
image via http://chromogenic.net/070911
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