Thursday, April 4, 2013

Fear of the dark

In order to find love you must take a risk and put yourself out there.
     This I realize.
     But just because you recognize something as truth doesn't make it any easier to put into practice.


I've put an invisible wall up around myself. (specifically my heart) Most don't realize it exists. I'm too gracious for the average person to see it. I will befriend any Tom, Dick, or Harry I happen to meet. But if for some reason I feel my walls begin to crumble or something causes the ground on which they stand to shift...

                      I run.
                         (metephorically.)
                         (....well for the most part.)


The possibility of letting someone in far enough for them to love me also comes with the threat of letting them in just enough for them to break me.


That brokenness, the darkness, that place where rejection and hurt lives,
              scares the living daylights out of me.

                                      For God's sake, I've always been afraid of the dark.

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